Sunday, April 16, 2006

900 words for TOK. Woot. Not much of an accomplishment, but its a step in the left direction.

*plot twist*

Ill be in Cambodia in about 5 days. WOW. Havent really done much to prepare for the trip. I better go to a group meeting to see what the hell is going on. What language do they speak there anyway?

*plot twist*

Since this term started, i've been slacking off. Quite badly, in fact. The correct thing to do is blame myself. I should be working harder, working longer, working smarter, etc. The wrong thing to do is to blame the ungodly hours, insane amount of information and ridiculous activities Notice how i cunningly leave the details ambiguous (For all you know, Im talking about DotA). Because if i didnt, I might have to testify at my own show trial( I am talking about DotA...).

DotA is a great game. But the fact of the matter is it takes up a lot of the players time.Waaaay to much time.This problem could easily be resolved by the programmers and hosts. They can make shorter games. Still addictive, but in small doses, so as not to drain us too badly. But they choose not to. Why? Because they believe its better this way. And that they have a duty to the gaming commision... or whatever it is they answer to, ( Icefrog? Blizzard? Or-something-else-entirely?)to keep it this way. And their are the forums and discussions and everything that happens after the games to give yourself a more well-rounded experience.Despite the fact that its still all meaningless.I wonder if they ip ban those complain or try to change the system.They dont have to.Not a lot of people complain anymore. Since players cant do anything about it, they dont. And eventually, they're going to convince themselves thats its the way things are supposed to go. Wasting half your day on something that wont mean anything after your gone is what human life is all about? Right?

But Im talking nonsense. In all honesty, DotA is a great game. The people who made it are geniuses, almost humanitarians. I apologize to them. I dont think that DotA is time wasting. Far from it, i think DotA is one of the best this to spend your time on. Its a beautiful game. Its addictive, but in a good way.Its one of the easiest ways to relax i know. Its really helped me through some tense times. Im actually starting to feel bad for all this. I might as well hand myself over to the Analogy Police.

*plot twist*

i hate the feeling you get when you latch onto a really great big idea.. then it dissapears when your not looking. I hate not making sense anymore. I hate knowing that i dont make any sense anymore. I hate forgetfulness. I hate the way there arent enough words anymore. I hate reruns. I hate prequels, sequels and spinnoffs.

I wonder whether it makes any sense anymore. I know im different now. Still as patchwork as ever, but maybe a bit more zen about it? Philosophy and comics help a lot more than one thinks. Especially things like the Invisibles.... or maybe ,things like Seaguy. Once i remember thinking in great big concepts. Ideas and dreams and bullshit like that.When i look back at some of my earlier ...posts, esspecially the ones over a couple of months old, i realize how much one can change in short period of time. I seem to bounce between two extremities of idiocy.I still do. I still like a daydreaming idealist. But different now of course. Different in the same way as before?Im retracing my steps back down whole news paths. Weird innit.